Is that ALL IT WAS?

Yes, I was laughing. I'm actually somewhat ashamed, but I was so relieved that Sister Caprice is all right!

This afternoon I received a phone call from Father T. at the retreat house. He sounded quite amused himself, and said that Sister Caprice had come to his office that morning and that he had asked to call myself and Father on her behalf, although she was going to tell us the real news herself.

While on retreat, he also had seen how quiet Sister Caprice was, and as it turns out, he was once an Associate Pastor at her parish and so was quite familiar with her personality. Thank God for this small world! And she seemed so desolate that he also grew concerned and approached her after Mass yesterday. As she had with us, he asked her if she was all right, said he was happy to see her and would love to have a chat the next day if she'd be willing. She tried to explain that she was on retreat so he exercised a little authority and said that he was placing her under obedience to appear in his office at a particular time. She agreed.

When she arrived, he indeed brought up her normally-cheery personality and asked her if all was well here at the monastery, what had brought her on a silent retreat, and all those things. She kept saying that all was well. He of course brought the conversation 'round to her discernment and what she was learning, and the poor girl burst into tears!

He didn't expect that and eventually she was able to tell him her news. Father T. assured me that her news was really quite wonderful, although clearly she didn't understand what "discernment" was and that it really required a bit more than a silent retreat. So he suggested to her that as she was living at the monastery, she should be talking to Father and I about what was going on so that we could help her discern properly. She had admitted that she hadn't spoken with us and was apparently planning to do so after her retreat. That child was in absolute AGONY and she so could have saved herself all of THAT! Of course, at that point I still had no idea what was going on so Father T. said he'd have Sister Caprice call, and he was sending her home this evening.

Sure enough, the phone rang again, and it was our dear Sister Caprice. She haltingly explained that she would tell us more when she got home, but she'd been so quiet because, while praying in the chapel, she felt that the Lord was calling her to a cloistered community! So she was trying hard to live out what she thought that meant, and she was truly terrified and didn't think she could do it, but wanted to go and "enjoy nature" before she, well, quote/unquote "died".

That girl will be the DEATH of me, I tell you! I told her I looked forward to seeing her smiling face again and that I wanted to hear all about what she was thinking about so we could help her...prepare...for whatever she and Jesus were planning.

And I must say, she sounded a LOT more like the Sister Caprice we all know! Remind me to send a Thank You card to Father T.!

And of course, when I told Father he just ROARED and can't WAIT to hear the rest of this story!

Sister Perpetua, Sister Maxine and Brother Gus...don't you DARE tease her about this! This is ONE thing that is COMPLETELY off limits and I MEAN it!

Dominicans can pray!

Since Father and Mother have both been hounding me to give the report on my excursion to the Dominicans earlier this week, I better finally get around to it!

Wow! What a parish! There are tons of young families there, each with it seemed like 4-8 children; all well behaved and attentive at the evening Mass that I happened upon. (I went after work, as it seemed a good crowd did too.) It was as near to paradise as I've been in a long time.

The Church is set up in an old English Monastery style, (before Henry VIII went all nutso and destroyed everything!), with a choir section for the friars, a beautiful wood and ivory communion rail, and carvings of saints at every corner. As you walked in, there was just tremendous soaring of spirit, and prayer erupted from the heart.

Imagine my surprise when after Mass the crowds stayed, and didn't immediately run off. They had adoration for about an hour while some of the friars heard confessions, and one of the brothers there came out and led us in devotions. After the deacon gave Benediction, and put Jesus away, the same brother came back out and gave a wonderful talk on discernment (I so wish that Sister Caprice could've been there!)

The highlights were as follows:
- prayer before the Blessed Sacrament is vital to hearing where God is leading you.
- as you are drawn to a community, read about the founder (or foundress) and see how God led him or her to address a specific need in the life of the Church.
- take small steps to explore life with the particular community, including making contact with the Vocation Director.

As I sat there and heard snippets of Brother Jerome's testimony, my heart was burning within me and I just felt completely drawn to the community.

I am not sure where this is going to lead, but whenever I think of life as a Dominican, my heart starts to race. Father, could this be a sign?

Oh, I forgot to answer the question that I was sent there to address in the first place! Why is Eucharistic Adoration so important in the discernment of a vocation? I asked Brother Jerome this question after his reflection. Simply put, he said, it is in Eucharistic Adoration that we come face to face with Our Lord, truly present. As we gaze upon Him in the Monstrance, He stares back into the depth of our souls and calls us to die to the self and live for Him. Besides when we receive Him in the Eucharist at Holy Mass, we are never closer to Him than when we pray before Him in the Blessed Sacrament.

This all made so much sense to me. I am hoping that we can start more periods of Adoration here at our monastery, whatever we'll call it, in the near future. After all, once we get rid of those horrible felt banners, our chapel could be almost as nice as the Dominican's!

Join the Navy!

Let me tell you a few things, all of you, all potential discerners. And everyone else.

A Vocation is a calling from God. It's special. And a lot of people "hear" it, but so few respond. And part of that is the noise of this world, and part is the plague of "option overload." Too many of our youth (all of them, in fact) have grown up with so many options that they don't even know how to CHOOSE anymore!

It's not a matter of wheat bread versus white. It's a matter of Italian or Wheat or French or Honey Oat, or Parmesan Garlic, or Asiago Wheat or Pumpernikle Sesame Rye with candy sprinkles burned on top.

It's too much! As much as this society talks about "choice" and provides "choice", our youth are paralyzed by "choices"! And in the end, they can't choose!

Poor Sister Clarice is such a perfect example of this! (Sorry, dear Sister...and you're right...you're the only one I have to pick on. I can't wait to have "sons"!) And your dilemma isn't really your fault. It's the culture.

And that's why I've started this community. As an aid in discernment. Everyone is confused...even me!

Let me give you a piece of advice, but I'm going to tell a story first! (I'm old..I get to do that.)

I knew a young lady who wanted to be a Navy SEAL. I think this was before "GI Jane" came out, or maybe she made this "decision" as a result of the movie. Who knows? In any case, she'd raced on her high school swim team, she was a lifeguard, and really, she just LOVED being in the water.

So you see, she DISCERNED that she had a calling to serve God in the water. Her college dorm room was filled with FISH decorations, for goodness' sake!

What I've never been able to figure out, though, was that her college major was chemistry with a minor in biology. I'd have thought 'twould be the other way around.

Well, that girl ALSO had a big cross to bear; she had back problems. And that Navy SEAL training ain't easy! Yet she never stopped talking about it. Becoming a SEAL was a HUGE part of her life. It was what she was ALL ABOUT!

But you know what...she never took the first step!

In order to become a SEAL, the basic requirement is that one JOIN THE NAVY!

You got it right..that girl NEVER joined the Navy! How was she going to meet that goal?

Never mind that they didn't allow women to be SEALs anyway! But she never considered other options, such as the Coast Guard, which DOES allow women to serve as Rescue Swimmers! They may not be SEALs, but darn it, they serve in the water and they use the same talents (but to a better end, if you ask me. They're not combat oriented and they SAVE the combat-oriented who tend to call on them for help.)

So, my dear brothers and sisters and sons and daughters...if you feel you are called to something, take the first step! Don't just learn about it and study it with a microscope! Actually put your FOOT on the darned thing! Even if it doesn't seem possible, sometimes you have to take a step or so to get there.

No, that young lady would never have become a SEAL, even if they did allow women. But in joining the Navy she might at least have found the skills for something else. She's now married and I think she has children. Which is just WONDERFUL. However, I can't help by ask whether she would have contributed her gifts to our country by joining the Navy, and STILL managed to be a married mother. (Also a Vocation in need of discernment....)

So that's the moral of the story, you young people.

JOIN THE NAVY!