Friday, May 30, 2008

I don't know what to do!

Some of this comes from a comment I made to Mother Frangelico about priests, and some of this is advice I got from other people. I'm so sorry about the jumble, but I have so many questions I don't even know where to go first!


So, anyway, I got a bunch of letters this week from friends, and people from my church. And they have all sorts of advice. My friends tell me about the habits and they sent me emails with links to different communities, and I know and love those habits. And so they've told me I should make sure I like the habit because I'll be spending my life wearing it! And so I've been looking around for habits I like, and found a few...the Sisters of Life, and the Dominicans - the ones who wear habits, that is. I like habits and won't really consider a community that doesn't have them. Because most of them just look like my grandmother and I don't want to look like my grandmother yet. (I think those "habit-less communities DO have a habit, though...pantssuits. And I think their understanding of God follows their lack of fashion sense!)

So then another friend told me to look at other things, like what they do, or don't do. And so I've been looking at all the apostolates, and I'm so confused because I want to do all of it and maybe have in some senses! But there's so much!

And everyone is back to telling me different things, and one friend says to look at the spiritualities and the charisms, and others say the same thing, but they all say different things all at the same time! One says I'm Benedictine, another says I'm Franciscan, others like the Dominicans, others like the Augustinians...and it just goes on! And one friend things I should quash it all and become a RABBI!

I don't want to be a Rabbi! And someone else said I should start an Ashram and build a labyrinth and be a yoga guru. I don't want to do ANY of those things! But some of the religious communities out there DO want to do those things! (I don't think they're Catholic even though they say they are...)

Anyway, it's so confusing! So where do I start?


And then...well, I'm worried about thinking priests are cute. Because let's face it, some of them are really cute! it a sin to think a priest is cute? Do I have to go to confession if I think a priest is cute, if I have no intention of taking that further than realizing that God does good work and the view is good at Mass?

Oh, dear, don't misconstrue that!

This is just getting worse and worse and worse! It MUST be a sin, because I'm now saying things I didn't intend to say! I have to go to Confession for thinking a priest is cute? If I do, what if the priest I go to is the one I thought was cute? Because sometimes they have their names on the confessional, but it's someone else, or it just says "visitor" and it's a different parish but that cute priest is the visiting one? Even if I go behind a screen and realize that's the priest, how can I confess that I think he's cute? He would take it wrong and it would sound like I was hitting on him in Confession!

I would NEVER do that! Oh my goodness, I would DIE if he thought I was doing that! And it would be awfullly hard for him, too, because then he'd feel very awkward, and the Sacrament is very serious, and then he'd be embarassed. And I'd be embarassed. And if he knew it was me, I'd never be able to talk to him ever again because I just couldn't get over that!

And even if the cute priest I was worried about was not the same one I was confession to, but THAT priest was really cute, wouldn't it be like the same thing?

Oh, dear, I wish priests weren't cute! Or good-looking in any way. Now I have to go to Confession and I'd rather confess to murder.

Hey! That's an idea! Mother Frangelico and Father, if I confess to murder, even though I haven't killed anyone, would God give me credit for that confession even though he would realize that I only thought a priest was cute. Or is robbing the priesthood worse than murder, because isn't thinking a priest is cute a slippery slope that can lead to robbing the priesthood, leading to him leaving his vows for me and then depriving people of the sacraments?

Oh, dear, I'm going to HELL!


Sister Perpetua said...

FINALLY! Things are getting interesting around her. 'Bout time!

Sister Caprice robbing the priesthood? A priest leaving his vows for her? Sister Caprice a...a...VULTURE?

Wow! Right here in our own monastery! I thought the shadows were pretty dark in the hallway, but WOW, in our own happy-go-lucky Sister Caprice there are SHADOWS!

I can't wait to see how THIS turns's like a regular melodrama, being played out right in front of me!

I haven't been this interested in anything since I was a toddler.

Sister Maxine said...

So, Sr. Caprice - do you think FATHER is cute????

What about Brother Brit or Brother Gus?

Just because they're cute doesn't mean they want you - does it?

Sister Caprice said...

No, I don't think FATHER is cute!

Oh...sorry, Father. That's not to say you're ugly by any means. It's just that...uh...well, you probably don't want to be considered to be "cute" anyway, but everyone wants to be good looking in some way...oh, dear, I think I just hurt Father's feelings..!

Now I REALLY don't know what to do!

And I'm not TALKING about Br. Brit or Br. Gus! I'm confused enough already..don't bring them into this!

Oh, I'm sure I'm going to Hell!

Sister Perpetua said...

Well, I'll go ahead and say it and I don't care who knows! I think Brother Brit and Brother Gus are both very good looking. And I don't think it's a sin to say so. And I think Father is good-looking, too (although he's more...advanced...than we are.) So just go ahead and admit they're cute and be done with it! It's not a big deal. * shrug *

Just because you think someone is good looking doesn't mean you're ready to ride off into the sunset together.

Besides...Brother Gus told me he thinks Sister Caprice is cute. You can read into that if you want. I wouldn't.

Mother Frangelico said...

Sister Caprice, let's talk about the letters and emails...for now, just ignore any advice that does not come out of this Monastery..unless it's from a Vocations director at a community you visit!, if you did not commit murder, you may not confess to it as a "substitution". As far as the rest of it...well, you can talk to Father about that. I have a headache after listening to you screech!

Cathy_of_Alex said...

Sister: You realize in some orders you were a habit to bed too. Kind of puts a kibosh on any serious romantic intentions. Period.

LOL! You goofball! Oh, excuse me, SISTER


Sister Caprice said...

Sister: You realize in some orders you were a habit to bed too. Kind of puts a kibosh on any serious romantic intentions. Period.

Are you calling me a PROSTITUTE!????

WHAT!????? I have NEVER....

WHAT??????????????? That's the most AWFUL thing anyone has EVER said to me, including my Mother!

I've NEVER been a "habit to bed"!

Mother Frangelico....!

* sniff * I'll be in the chapel!

Cathy_of_Alex said...

Sister: I meant "wear". You misunderstood me. Possibly, intentionally since I think you are sort of a drama queen.

I did not call you a prostitute. Must be your guilty conscience.

Please spend more time in CALM, meditative, prayer. I will too.


I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings.

Sister Maxine said...

I agree with Sr. Perpetua - so what if they are cute. They are still made in God's image - we should thank God for their cuteness.

But I think Father is letting his cuteness get to his head! I saw him the other day coming out in ... a dress!
(I think his cuteness may be affecting his brains).

Somehow I don't think Cathy of Alex meant that YOU were a habit in bed! Goodness gracious! I think a 'habit' is what nuns WEAR... not who they are.
you're soooo silly!

Father said...

Well, I am glad you all think I am 'cute.' I had thought that I passed along that title a long time ago. This does give me further reflections for my homily today: we must keep our grounding in Christ and not in the vain pursuit of vanity. (Perhaps we should use Ecclesiates for our table reflections this week?)

Sister Maxine, I would think you would know the difference between a 'dress' and a 'cassock.' What I was wearing was the latter, my dear, the traditional garb for the Latin Rite clergy. (Some of the Eastern Rites have us beat, hands down!)

Sister Caprice said...

Cathy, I read over what you said last night again and again and I kept coming up with the same thing! How was I to know that you meant "wear" instead of "were"?

And quiet meditation is all I can do these days with these crutches. Mother Frangelico told me to "offer it up", though, so I'm trying to figure out how to hold my foot over my head for that long.

Sister Caprice said...

Sister Maxine, I thought it was a dress, too! But Father caught me looking at his strangely and said something about the Cossaks, and I remember a piece of music we played in high school, something to do with the Cossaks or something like that, and I asked him if everone in Russia dresses that way? Because I know the Scots wear kilts, so I actualy thought he was wearing a black kilt, and I've never seen a Scot wearing a black kilt.

I've never seen Father play the bagpipes, either. Father, do you play the bagpipes?

So...anyway...Father are you saying I'm not going to Hell for thinking some priests are cute?